Baby Girl

It's hard to believe that just 9 months ago we were just two naive newlyweds and now we are two naive people about to become parents!  It hasn't been the easiest 9 months for either one of us, but there is finally a light at the end of the tunnel!  

We have always talked about wanting kids, but we decided that we wanted at least two years of it being just us.  And I am so glad that we did that.  I have learned so much about Justin in the past two years, and I've learned a lot about myself.  I learned that marriage isn't always bliss.  I have also learned that anything worthwhile is worth fighting for.  We may have rough patches, but I am so glad to say that the good times have most definitely outweighed the bad.  Who knew that going on a date with some guy over four years ago would lead me to this day.  The day were I can sit and hold my husband's hand who is about to become a father to my child. :)

When I first realized I was pregnant i just felt...weird.  I could tell something was off.  I went to the store and took 2 pregnancy tests.  Both showed those two little lines that would forever change our lives.  I wanted to make sure before I told Justin, so I hid the tests and went back to the store a few more times.  14 pregnancy tests later, 13 of them being positive, I couldn't deny the fact that I was cooking a little Keith inside of me.

  

 I may have been a little nervous, at least nervous enough to take this awkward selfie.  Not sure if I was about to cry, laugh, or faint.

I was scared to tell Justin.  I knew he would be excited, it just scary to have to tell someone that their life is about to change drastically forever.  Knowing for a few weeks without telling anyone began to make me crazy.  One day, I woke up unusually early after working a graveyard shift.  It was a Thursday.  Every Thursday Justin goes and eats breakfast with his grandpa(adorable I know!). For some reason he didn't get home until later that morning.  I was getting so frustrated.  (hormones taking their ravenous toll on me!)  He walked through the door and said that he was surprised to see me up so early.  I questioned where he had been for so long.  He said that he stopped by to talk to his sister for awhile because he thought that I would be asleep still.  I usually am able to suppress anger, but not this day.  I laid into him!  I started crying, saying things like he loves his sister more than me (once again, please remember the hormones).  He was trying so hard to understand where I was coming from.  He finally had to leave for work and he said that we could talk about things after he got home that night.  

It took me all of two seconds after he left to realize how crazy I had acted.  It was then that I decided that he needed to know that his wife was acting like a psycho for a reason. Thanksgiving was the next week, so me being the cheesy person that I am made signs to put all over the house that were reasons why I was so thankful for Justin and all that he does.  I listed all the qualities that make me grateful for him and then I handed him a box when he got home.  I told him that it was for being so rude and that the present was hopefully going to make our next Thanksgiving a better one.  Inside was a baby's camouflage jacket and a Thanksgiving onesie.  Then, a note saying that he has all the qualities that are going to make him a great dad, and of course my plethora of pregnancy tests that I had saved throughout the weeks.  One of the best moments of my life was the embrace he gave me after he said, "I'm going to be a dad?!".  We both cried and spent the rest of the night talking about the future.  It's one of those nights that will bring a smile to my face for rest of forever.

We went to the doctor a couple weeks later and he confirmed that there was most definitely a little jelly bean swimming inside of me.  We decided to tell our families on Christmas.  I mean, even if we gave them a crappy gift hopefully the good news would make up for it right? 

This is the gift we gave to my sister Jenna because she made me promise her before I was even dating anyone that she would be the first one to know when I was pregnant and she reminded me of that promise pretty much everyday since I have been married.  So this was me keeping my promise..

You know those women who tell you how beautiful is is to be pregnant?  How amazing it is to have so much energy, and are always happy, and are overjoyed by the miracle inside of them?  Yeah... I wanted to tell them that they are full of it!  I was nauseous from the very beginning.  I kept waiting for the first trimester to over with because apparently normal people start to feel better after that.  Of course that wasn't me!  I lost 25+ pounds in the first half of my pregnancy.  I threw up with every smell, every meal, every time I got into the car, I would wake up in the middle of night and run to the bathroom.  I finally strategically set up different buckets for me throughout the house for when I tossed my cookies.  Poor Justin...  He helped me out as much as he could.  He would come into the bathroom and rub my back even when I repeatedly told him to get out.  He would wash my clothes if anything got on them.  He has been such an amazing help and this pregnancy has been rough on him too.  He always feels helpless when I get sick and I know he wishes that there was something he could do to help me feel better.

I'll never forget the night that scared both of us pretty bad.  I started bleeding and didn't know what to do. I will never forget that night that we both were in our front room and he began to pray.  That is one prayer that I remember feeling like everything was going to be ok.  The Spirit helped calm me through the prayer he offered. Luckily, everything turned out to be ok over time.  

So here we are, 38 weeks into this and excited, scared, nervous.  I use to want things to slow down because I didn't feel ready. I am now to the point to where I feel like I'm constantly melting form the heat, my legs resemble an elephant's,I waddle like a penguin, my body is doing all sorts of weird things, I can never be in a comfortable position, sleeping is pretty much impossible and contractions come and go. 

 We have debated on names ever since we found out we were having a baby girl.  Of course we had a name picked out for a boy before we ever even got married.  Justin would come up with names he loved, I didn't like them as much.  I would come up with adorable names and of course, he didn't like them.  We went back and forth for months.  Finally, about a month ago, Justin was going through the list of names we had written down and said that he like the name Abbigail.  I liked it too and so we decided no more debating, Abbigail it was!

We have most everything we need for our baby girl... I think.  How is a first time mother to know everything she needs?  Justin talks to her every day.  He kisses my belly, tells me to stay out of their conversations, and even tries to dance with her as he holds my belly and sways side to side.  I think that is what I am most excited for.  To see my baby girl in her daddy's arms.  He is going to be the most amazing dad!  I can't wait for he to get here!!!